How do you view yourself? Do you like what you see when you look in the mirror? Everybody has a specific way they see themselves, pertaining to their hobbies, occupations, income, physical features, hometown, etc… Whether it's good or bad doesn't change the fact that we are constantly thinking about the way others must see us. Everybody is always wondering what others opinions on us are, if they notice certain traits that we notice, if they find us attractive, and so much more. We are obsessed with the image we expose to the world and we try to change based on what we believe people will be pleased with. The level of which we alter ourselves depends on who you are, however all people do this to some extent.
If you were to go ask five strangers to tell you their perception of your personality, and their opinions on your looks (imagine they were 100% honest), their answers would be immensely different from the answers you would get from people who you saw often. Studies show that if somebody knows you, and likes your personality, they will generally think you're more appealing than if they didn't know you at all. The more you get to know people, the more physically attractive or unattractive you will become depending on whether that person enjoys your company. Your view on your personality affects your view on your looks; so do other peoples. This proves that when you look in the mirror, you don't necessarily see what others see because everyone has different opinions on what good personality traits are.
Not only do we see ourselves in a way that varies from the way others see us, but we also see ourselves in a way that varies from the way we see others. When we think about the way we look and the way we act, all of our thoughts and emotions and experiences factor into that. When we see others, we judge these things based on what we know from what we observe through looking and listening. A lot of the things we think about other people are just guesses. The only possible way to find out if it is true is if that person told us, which they may or may not do because it requires exposing one's inner self.
We hide our true selves in attempt to appeal to the people around us. We constantly are changing our standards to please others. We aren't always conscious of this, which affects our personal view on ourselves. When we modify our personalities and cover our imperfections we don't know who we are anymore. We shouldn't have to think very deeply to have a good understand of ourselves, that is something we should know on the surface.
If people made an effort to be less concerned with the millions of unimportant viewpoints of random strangers they will probably never see again, they would all have a stronger sense of self. We can try and view ourselves through varying individual's eyes, we would get an idea of what people thought about us. We will never fully be competent enough to look at ourselves the way others do, but we can try and think in different ways and imagine looking at ourselves from different perspectives. We should also strive to disregard rude comments or gestures about our appearances or the way we act, because dwelling on it will only diminish our self esteem. This will make us more confident and happier with our image if we aren't so clueless and concerned with what people think.
Story by Willow Schenk
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